"The Truth About Stereotypes..."

Brysen Keith, 21, is the only guy on the University of Detroit Mercy dance team. He says he gets some weird looks from people in the crowd, but a lot of positive reaction, too. / Jarrad Henderson/Detroit Free Press

This is a headline from an article in my local newspaper today...

"A Few Minutes With... A Man With Pom-Poms"

Now, let me ask you, Is there anyone who didn't expect this story to be about a gay man?"

And we all collectively said, "No, we're pretty sure this is about a gay man." 

And this is one of the truths about stereotypes, they are sometimes very accurately predictive of things about people.  But the other truth about stereotypes, and this is why they are so dangerous, is that people want to apply them to groups of people universally.  So in this case, while yes, this man has pom-poms, you can't extrapolate that to: "All gay men probably have pom-poms." I don't have pom-poms and I don't want any...

But until we are all able to be who we are openly and without fear, the belief in the universality of gay stereotypes will persist.  And people will continue to believe all manner of fallacies about us including things like: "All gay men are promiscuous..." "Gay people don't believe in love and fidelity in marriage..." "Gay people can't raise happy, well adjusted children..." "Gays are all pedophiles... (although we need to admit some are, think John Wayne Gacy)." I could go on and on about this, but you get the idea.

If we are ever to overcome the stereotypes that hold us back, it will only be by letting people see who we really are. Then they will discover that we possess the same human diversity of character in our interests, beliefs and behaviors as everyone else. Admittedly, the fact that we happen to be same gender loving is a part of who we are that has a powerful influence on us, but it isn't the only thing that makes us who we are. We are as uniquely human as everyone else.

When we are able to come out to the world and let them know us, then it will be fun to recognize that there are these gay personality traits that sometimes go together. But then people will be able to see them for what they are, traits that make us human beings who may also happen to be gay. And when that day arrives, we'll all be able to smile just like I did when I read this headline and be happy for someone expressing who they really are openly and freely.

Read the article from the Detroit Free Press here.

"Fear Eats the Soul"

* This story probably caught my eye because I am an alumnus of University of Detroit Mercy