Thursday, February 19, 2015

"The Truth About Irrational Religiously Inspired Hate..."


Pediatrician Wouldn't Care For Baby With 2 Moms

Krista Contreras and her wife Jami Contreras of Oak Park are devastated after facing discrimination they never saw coming: The pediatrician they had handpicked to treat their newborn daughter changed her mind. 

Tresa Baldas
February 18, 2015

Sitting in the pediatrician's office with their 6-day-old daughter, the two moms couldn't wait to meet the doctor they had picked out months before.

The Roseville pediatrician — one of many they had interviewed — seemed the perfect fit: She took a holistic approach to treating children. She used natural oils and probiotics. And she knew they were lesbians.

But as Jami and Krista Contreras sat in the exam room, waiting to be seen for their newborn's first checkup, another pediatrician entered the room and delivered a major blow: The doctor they were hoping for had a change of heart. After "much prayer," she decided that she couldn't treat their baby because they are lesbians.

Doctor's letter: Why she wouldn't care for baby with 2 moms

"I was completely dumbfounded," recalled Krista Contreras, the baby's biological mother. "We just looked at each other and said, 'Did we hear that correctly?' .... When we tell people about it, they don't believe us. They say, '(Doctors) can't do that. That's not legal.' And we say, 'Yes it is.'"

The Contrerases of Oak Park are going public with their story to raise awareness about the discrimination that the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community continues to face. There is no federal or Michigan law that explicitly prohibits discrimination against LGBT individuals.

For months, the couple kept quiet about what happened to them and their baby Bay Windsor Contreras — at Eastlake Pediatrics last October.

But the pain and frustration wouldn't go away. So they broke their silence.

"We want people to know that this is happening to families. This is really happening," said Jami Contreras, 30, who was blindsided that fall day in the doctor's office. "It was embarrassing. It was humiliating ... It's just wrong."

Doctor apologizes

The pediatrician at issue is Vesna Roi, 49, who has been practicing pediatric medicine for 19 years.

Roi said that she could not comment on the case, citing the federal HIPPA law, which requires medical providers to protect the privacy of patients. But she did defend her commitment to pediatric medicine and helping children.

"My life is taking care of the babies," Roi told the Free Press on Tuesday. "I love my families, my patients. I love my kids. And I have become very close with all my patients."

Roi, meanwhile, has apologized to Jami and Krista Contreras in a handwritten letter, which was obtained by the Free Press. It states:

"Dear Jami & Krista, I am writing this letter of apology as I feel that it is important and necessary. I never meant to hurt either of you. After much prayer following your prenatal (visit), I felt that I would not be able to develop the personal patient doctor relationship that I normally do with my patients."

The letter, dated Feb. 9, did not explain why Roi felt that way, nor did it mention anything about the two women being lesbians. It did, however, state that the Contrerases were "always welcome in our office" and that they could still get care from another pediatrician who was on staff.

Jami Contreras, 30, of Oak Park, changes her 4-month-old daughter Bay. Contreras and her wife, Krista Contreras, are devastated after facing discrimination they never saw coming: The pediatrician they had handpicked to treat their newborn daughter changed her mind about treating their baby. The doctor said she prayed on it, and just couldn't do it. (Photo: Mandi Wright/Detroit Free Press)

Roi also apologized for not telling the Contrerases about her decision in person.

"I felt that it was an exciting time for the two of you and I felt that if I came in and shared my decision, it would take away much of the excitement. That was my mistake," the letter stated. "I should have spoken with you that day."

The letter concluded:

"Please know that I believe that God gives us free choice and I would never judge anyone based on what they do with that free choice. Again, I am very sorry for the hurt and angry feelings that were created by this. I hope that you can accept my apology."

Decision not illegal

Krista and Jami Contreras are not suing Roi. They concede that Roi did nothing illegal — which is precisely what they have a problem with: There are few laws on the books that protect the LGBT community from discrimination.

"There's no law that prohibits it," Wayne State University Constitutional Law Professor Robert Sedler said of Roi's actions. "It's the same as a florist refusing to sell flowers for a same-sex wedding."

Currently, 22 states have laws that prohibit doctors from discriminating against someone based on their sexual orientation. Michigan is not one of these states.

Michigan does have its own anti-discrimination law known as the Elliott-Larsen Civil Rights Act. But it doesn't cover LGBT individuals. Neither do federal employment laws included in the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which prohibit hiring or employment discrimination on the basis of a person's"race, color, religion, sex, or national origin," not sexual orientation.

Legislative efforts to add LGBT individuals to federal and Michigan anti-discrimination laws have been made over the years, none successfully.

Sedler, who teaches equality issues at Wayne State University, said Roi didn't violate any laws.

"Basically, the pediatrician handled this in an appropriate way," Sedler said. "She turned them over to another doctor."

However, Sedler added, Roi's actions as a licensed doctor raise an ethical issue.

"Here you have a doctor saying I won't treat a baby of a lesbian couple … I think that's very troubling," he said. "It's clearly not illegal, but it certainly raises an ethical question."

Attorney Dana Nessel, who is handling the Michigan same-sex marriage case that's about to be heard by the U.S. Supreme Court, believes the laws need to change. If not, she said, more families like the Contrerases will be mistreated by the medical profession.

"It's a very scary thing," Nessel said of doctors being allowed to refuse to treat patients. "What kind of a society are we that we would allow this to happen?"

While Michigan doctors can refuse to treat a gay person, or their children, citing religious freedoms, the medical profession strongly opposes it.

The American Medical Association (AMA) and the American Academy of Pediatrics have taken a strong stance against this practice and have prohibited it in their ethics rules, which are only advisory.

"Respecting the diversity of patients is a fundamental value of the medical profession and reflected in long-standing AMA ethical policy opposing any refusal to care for patients based on race, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, or any other criteria that would constitute invidious discrimination," said a statement from Dr. Gregory Blaschke, chair of the AMA's LGBT Advisory Committee. It added that the AMA encourages "diversity, awareness and cultural sensitivity in the medical profession."

For Jami and Krista Contreras, the medical policies are comforting, but they're not enough. It's time, they said, for the laws to change so that no LGBT person experiences what they did that fall day in the pediatrician's office. Roi, they said, gave no signs that she was opposed to their lifestyle when they met her. She told them to schedule an appointment when the baby was born, they said. And they did just that.

Then came the blow.

"You're discriminating against a baby?" Jami Contreras said. "It's just wrong."


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The truth about religion and the irrational hate it inspires is that always harms the innocent... This is why marriage equality and non-discrimination protects are so essential and important to our families.

Eddie and I took our two children to the optometrist for the first time last month and we encountered this same type of religiously inspired hatred.  And it's not limited to irrational (so called) Christians.  Our boys formerly had a foster parent of another ethnicity who patronized Arab and Muslim healthcare practitioners, and so we elected to maintain these relationships to ensure their continuity of care. Their optometrist was an Arab Muslim doctor with a large practice in Dearborn, Michigan. 

When I realized that we were being maltreated during our visit, at first I thought maybe it was racially inspired (we were the only non-Arab/Muslim family in the waiting room), but later when we were finally seen at the end of the day, despite arriving early for our appointment and watching others who arrived after us (some even late for their own appointment times which were after our's) but still being seen ahead of us, it became clear what the problem was. 

When we finally got to the exam room, we were specifically asked what our relationship to our children was. When I responded, "This is my husband and we are their adoptive parents," the hate and animus in the exam room was palpable.  From eye rolls to snide comments, the visit became so uncomfortable, that we elected to leave without having the boys prescriptions for new glasses filled there.  

When I complained to the Dr. about our treatment, he refused to explain it and walked away. Moments later, his assistant handed us the children's records and we left, not dumbfounded or surprised, but saddened that this is still the truth about irrational religiously inspired hatred, it harms the innocents.



"Fear Eats the Soul"



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