Yesterday, I was reorganizing some of my vinyl record collection when I came upon this album I bought as a young man...
And as I held this 40 year old album in my hands, I was transported back in time, not to 1984, but to the spring of 2007 when I played it for the beloved one on a lazy Sunday afternoon such as this one. It was in those days that we were both leaning into the early phases of getting to know one another and realizing that we had fallen in love.
Yesterday, almost unable to stop myself, I laid the record upon the turntable. I thought I wanted to hear a song from my youth and be reminded of that happy day with him that came so much later. But as I lifted the tone arm from its resting place my hand began to tremble with emotion, and I could not lay the needle into the groove... I realized almost too late that doing so would pierce my wounded heart yet again. And so, like my love for him, I returned the record to the sleeve, and the sleeve to the album cover and the album to the farthest corner of the lowest cabinet... it's still precious and dear to me... but also perhaps never to be seen by my eyes again, like him who it now reminds me of.
I am always remembering...
And my greatest fear is that I may not live long enough to forget.
I remember so well the account(s) of your loss - and indeed, though it sounds corny, I feel - and have felt - your pain! David
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