by Paul Novello, L.C.S.W., C.L.C., B.C.C.
Happiness is a choice. It’s true. You can choose to let life’s circumstances get you down or you can choose to be happy no matter what challenges life brings.
Happiness is already within each of us and we are born to be naturally happy! So why is it that, as we get older, we forget where to find happiness within ourselves and, instead, allow outside forces to undermine our joy?
You can determine your own happiness by following these simple strategies:
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Cliché, I know, however it’s so true. You don’t have to let life’s troubles and problems get you down. Yes, there will sometimes
be troubles because life isn’t always perfect, but you can definitely choose your reaction to situations. Look at the positive side of things and work hard to see the good in people and circumstances.
Find something you love to do and do it. Do you have a lifelong passion, dream or desire? Mine is singing. Connect with activities that bring you joy, and make time for them. Taking small steps towards a dream or goal will help you feel like you’re accomplishing something. You’ll find drive and determination to reach your goal when it’s something you absolutely love to do.
Do you have a gift or talent you’re not using? One reason so many people are unhappy is that they’re not doing what they’re called to do with their God-given talents. Each and every one of us has a purpose in life. You have natural gifts and talents to help you achieve your purpose, so use your gifts effectively!
When you’re feeling down, don’t wallow in your sorrows alone; do something about it. Seek out support. Call a friend who you know is positive and cheerful. Talk about your feelings and listen to their advice. So often, people allow themselves to go deeper and deeper into self-pity or depression because they think it has to be that way. If negative feelings persist, seek professional help. The truth is, you don’t have to be sad and you shouldn’t be. You can decide to be happy. You just have to make up your mind to do so.
Think about all the things you have to be thankful for. Often you may get so caught up in what’s wrong with your life that you forget to look at what’s right and good. Take a step back and reflect on your life. How far have you come from, say, six months ago?
Do you have family or friends to be thankful for? Yes, it’s true, they may not always be everything we’d like them to be, but imagine life without them. Now, be thankful that you have them in your life
Do you have a job? Maybe it’s not your ideal job, but in today’s economy, those of us who have an income can be thankful for it. You can always make changes to find or do something new.
When you’re feeling down, journal your thoughts and feelings. Often you’ll find that just getting your feelings down on paper will allow you to work through them, helping you to feel better about yourself and your beautiful life!
If you’ve been prone to look at life negatively, then you’ll have to put more energy into seeing and choosing happiness. But don’t let that stop you from being happy! You, too, can learn to be happy.
Practice the steps above and train your mind to focus intently on the positives. When you feel a negative thought coming on, or your mind gravitates toward the negative, learn to recognize it, stop it in its tracks, and then start thinking happier thoughts. Pave the way to a happier and more joyful life.
Starting from this moment onward, make the conscious choice to be happy!
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Paul Novello, L.C.S.W., C.L.C., B.C.C. is an author, therapist, and life coach in New York City. Paul created and developed Life Solutions for Gay Men, a personal development resource to empower gay men to achieve personal, professional and financial success. He provides life coaching to get you from where you are to where you want to be in any life area you want to improve. Paul is a highly sought after coach and consultant. He works with numerous organizations, including: Fortune 500 financial firms, law firms, healthcare companies, small businesses, and non-profit organizations.
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