"Love Brings Happiness To Life... Live Fearlessly"
Thursday, May 31, 2018
"Same Gender Loving People - No. 3063"
"Love Is Happiness..."
Positive images of people like me... The truth of the matter is that we all need to see people like ourselves. So everyday, I'll post a photo, drawing or some other artwork that depicts Same Gender Loving People as what we are... Only Human.
"This Made Me Smile..."
What most fascinates and amuses me about this is the engrossing conversation going on in the background...
You're really not watching this!
"Selfie Love..."
"Selfie Love" - those beautiful, grainy, out-of-focus self-pics that capture the truth of true love...
"The Truth About Who We Are..."
by thegaymenproject
photo by Kevin Truong
Peter, in his own words:"Was bedeutet es für dich, schwul zu sein? Für mich ist es eine Normalität einen Menschen zu mögen und zu lieben, wie zum Beispiel Heteros. Es ist für mich ein schönes Gefühl.
Welche Herausforderungen hattest du damit im Leben? In einem kleinen Dorf damit nicht akzeptiert zu werden, sogar verachtet zu werden. Im Job waren keine Probleme.
Mein Coming-out begann mit ca. 14 Jahren im Dorf, wo es nur heimlich gelebt werden konnte. Im Jahr 1985 habe ich das ComingOut in Hamburg erlebt und ausgelebt. Hamburg war als Großstadt damals toleranter.
Die Community, diese ist hier gut ausgeprägt, aber ich denke heutzutage ist die Toleranz für diese Community wieder auf einem absteigenden Ast. Schwul sein kann man nur in Großstädten wie Hamburg und auch da nur in bedingtem Rahmen ausleben. Es werden nach wie vor Grenzen aufgezeigt. Also eine vollkommene Toleranz gibt es nicht.
Tipp an mein jüngeres Ich, lebe so wie du fühlst und möchtest, aber sei nicht zu offen und halte gewisse Grenzen bei, dann lebst du da gut mit."
In English:
"For me (being gay) is a normality to like and to love, such as is the case with straight people. It's a great feeling for me.
(With regards to challenges) being in a small village and not being accepted, even despised. With regards to work I have had no problems.
My coming-out began about 14-years-old in the village, where I had to live in secret. In 1985, I experienced and lived out in Hamburg. Hamburg back then was a more tolerant big city.
The community is well developed here, but I think today the tolerance for the gay community is again starting to decrease. You can live openly gay only in big cities like Hamburg and even then only within a limited scope. There are still limits. So there is not a perfect tolerance.
Tip to my younger self, live like you feel and want, but do not be too open and keep certain limits, then you will live well."
Wednesday, May 30, 2018
"Selfie Love..."
"Selfie Love" - those beautiful, grainy, out-of-focus self-pics that capture the truth of true love...
"Same Gender Loving People - No. 3062"
"Love Is Happiness..."
Positive images of people like me... The truth of the matter is that we all need to see people like ourselves. So everyday, I'll post a photo, drawing or some other artwork that depicts Same Gender Loving People as what we are... Only Human.
"The Truth About Who We Are..."
by thegaymenproject
photo by Kevin Truong
Steve, in his own words: "Being gay means I was lucky enough to be born homosexual, to be born into this community that has existed in every cave, village and city for as long as we have existed as humans. Being gay gives me a connection to people I’ve never met, gives me a connection to a rich history, but most importantly it gives me a community that I care and fight for.
Being gay gives me the freedom to choose my own destiny, to be free from so many of the shackles that society dictates to the majority, I thrive in my difference and I believe this makes our entire society richer.
I think I’m too young to call anything I’ve done a success, I’d run the risk of looking a little smug. Living overseas, graduating with first class honors from a top university are all successes, but I have so many other people that I owe for these successes, I wouldn’t be where I am now without the support of other people, so I don’t want to take all the credit for this.
Personally however I think my greatest success is my acceptance of who I am and the pride I now take in who I am. It’s a great challenge to overcome your insecurities, I’ve had many of them, and I continue to have them, but I’ve come to a point where I own my insecurities, and I’ve never been happier.
I like to say we’re always coming out, to a certain degree. We have to come out whether overtly or subconsciously to every person we interact with, our sexuality is such a huge influence on who we are as a person and what our place within society is. I’m sad to say there are certain times I have chosen not to come out in certain environments and keep cosy in a very glittery wardrobe. My ‘classic’ coming out was in two episodes, Mum first when I was 13 then Dad when I was 17. Mum’s first reaction was “never tell your father, I don’t know how he will react,” her reaction was one of fear, not of me and my sexuality but fear for how society will treat me. It’s so sad that parents of fags are genuinely afraid for their child because of how heterosexuals will treat them.
Dad’s first reaction was “I’m so proud of you, you’re an incredible young man and you will achieve great things” (I may be embellishing a bit, but it went something like that). My immediate response was to look at my Mum and say “ALL THIS TIME!!!” But I don’t hold a grudge, she knew no better, and unfortunately parents these days don’t know how to deal with their child coming out. The language around coming out is the same language as that of mourning, or the loss of a limb; “It’s okay, you’ll be the same person in my eyes,” “…well despite this, I still love you.” It’s like, really? Despite what? Despite the fact that your child has now joined the ranks of an incredible community, immediately making them more progressive, empathetic and happy, you’ll still love them? How condescending! There are schools of thought out there that homosexuality is the next step in human evolution, and with technological advancement the idea of heterosexuality for procreation will become null. So to the parents thinking it’s such a sad thing that your child has just evolved into an amazing little homo, shame on you, go bake them a rainbow cake immediately. Less of this “I suppose you’ll have to do” and more confetti at coming outs, please!
I’m an eternal optimist and have found my place in Melbourne’s LGBTIQ community during a period of relevant calm, though this will all change very soon with the inevitable introduction of marriage equality and the changing landscape in the response to the HIV epidemic. So my experience of the community lacks the nostalgia of ‘Club X’ and ‘Bar Y,’ which is so often the frame people view this question with. I have been so lucky to have discovered the community behind the bars (though ironically, it takes going to a bar to find these communities, I know, it’s like Inception). I had to find these opportunities myself, the volunteer work, learning from the old queens I respect so much, surrounding myself by likeminded people and running by my golden rule, “be infinitely kind,” and you will get infinite kindness in return.
I live in a Collingwood bubble, here in Melbourne that means I’m a “Northside gay” and I must have a beard. I’m very lucky that my local bar is one of the world’s longest-continuously running gay bars (The Laird, I highly recommend it) that is rich in history and in community to this day means that I have been well placed to develop a positive identity for myself and an experience of my community that is so positive. Every part of the LGBTIQ community has its stereotypes, for example The Laird is the quintessential hairy-chested, hypermasculine sometimes-leather bar. But nowhere else do I feel more comfortable vogueing it up on the dance floor and nowhere else do I feel so accepted for however I want to express myself. It sounds a bit silly, but in general about various scenes, it’s not about the beard, the six pack, the tan, the politics, it’s what you have inside that really counts, and people will see that and appreciate that. If they don’t, then you’re hanging around with the wrong people.
We have a diverse and rich queer scene here too, think boys, beards and heels, with a reputation for groundbreaking art and performance from Berlin to New York. This is Melbourne, we’re dirty, we lack pretense and glamour, we do ‘different’ and we’re all the more happy for it. Melbourne rocks.
(Advice to my younger self) Listen and learn. Everyone is smarter than you, everyone has something to contribute to you and you have the duty to take it on board and pass it on. I’ve learnt this now, but I wish I knew this when I was a pretentious teenager trying so hard to fit in. I’d say to myself, look at who you really are, stop pretending, stop trying, you’ll become yourself eventually so just stop wasting time trying to be someone else – once you do, you will never be happier."
Tuesday, May 29, 2018
"The Poet's Corner..."
To The Moon
by Percy Bysshe Shelley
Art thou pale for weariness
Of climbing heaven and gazing on the earth,
Wandering companionless
Among the stars that have a different birth, -
And ever changing, like a joyless eye
That finds no object worth its constancy?
"Same Gender Loving People - No. 3062"
"Love Is Beautifully Human..."
Positive images of people like me... The truth of the matter is that we all need to see people like ourselves. So everyday, I'll post a photo, drawing or some other artwork that depicts Same Gender Loving People as what we are... Only Human.
"A True Love Story..."
A Guy Asks His Roommate If They’re Boyfriends. His Reply Is So Cute!
from BGay.com
This is a very cute story about a Reddit user who asks the community for advice about his relationship with his roommate after having come to the conclusion that they might be a bit more than just “friends with benefits”.
The 32-year-old commitment-impaired reddit user “hesmyboyfriend” met his current roommate/boyfriend Alan at a supermarket 18 months ago.
“I’ll be the first to admit, I have huge commitment issues- my parents threw me out for being gay and then shortly after I entered into an abusive relationship with a much older man. After that broke up because he found someone younger, I was inn a relationship with a guy who was in the closet and basically was his dirty secret until he got engaged to a woman without telling me and then wanted me to stick around. I didn’t. After that I became pretty anti relationship,” he says.
They flirted, hooked up and started hanging out together both inside and outside the bedroom. Then Alan’s lease was up and “hesmyboyfriend” asked him if he was interested in becoming his housemate. Alan couldn’t really afford it but they came to an arrangement where Alan would pay what he could, while also contributing by cooking and keeping the house clean.
“He loves cooking and cleaning anyway, his personality reminds me a lot of Monica from Friends only he works in a library,” he says.
“Before I knew it, I was getting packed lunches every day and he’s made a vegetable patch in the backyard.”
About two months after he moved in, Alan brought up being mutually exclusive “friends with benefits”. “hesmyboyfriend” hadn’t really slept with anyone except Alan for ages anyway so he agreed.
“A few months after that – Alan wanted to join the gym so I added him to my membership as my partner. We turn up to events with each other. We hang out a lot. He sleeps in my room more often than his room because we have sex there the most,” he says.
“Then last week we were at a party when someone asked what our relationship was. Alan laughed, looked at me straight in the eye and said that we were “mutually exclusive, housemates with benefits with income proportional expense sharing”.
“Now that just sounds ridiculous. I know I have a boyfriend, I’ve been sort of denying it all this time but that’s what Alan is.
“This situation is both really screwed up but I’ve also never been happier. He’s so easy to talk to, to hang out with and when he’s not at home I feel bored, like I don’t know what I did with myself before I met him.
“But somehow I both want him to be my boyfriend but a part of me is scared of getting in a relationship, even though I am in one.
“I just feel like saying the words will change everything it’s a commitment and I really want it but there’s that irrational part of me that is scared.
“Also I’m scared that Alan doesn’t think we’re in a relationship even though we are right? Alan has never had a boyfriend as long as I’ve know him and he has his own set of issues too, he’s parents basically tried to “pray away the gay” and he left of his own volition. He used to bring up very subtley about getting more serious but I would just evade and he stopped pushing. It’s so weird, like I can talk to him about everything and anything, we have these amazing conversations but lately this whole boyfriend thing is like the elephant in the room.
“How do I get over this fear of commitment and also what does it say that he’d put up with this crap from me?,” “hesmyboyfriend” asks the Reddit community.
Reddit users replied and urges him to be honest about his feelings. Some suggested that he should cook Alan a meal and then ask him, so that’s what he did.
In an update, he writes:
“It was a bit of a disaster, I screwed up the chicken dish I wanted to make, ended up making mac’n’cheese with this expensive gluten free saffron pasta because Alan is King of the Kitchen and even our olive oil is fancy.
“He was sympathetic but I could tell he was amused when I told him I screwed up the dish and was happy with mac’n’cheese.”
The Reddit user then wanted to pour Alan some wine and ended up knocking his glass into the mac’n’cheese and ruining it.
“So we ended up getting takeaway and watching Netflix and I was still a bit on edge because I’d screwed up the evening- we were cuddling so he could tell that I was a bit tense and not focused I guess.
“Anyway, he asked me what the matter was and I just blurted out “Are you my boyfriend?”, he looked uncertain and said “Yes, if you want me to be” and I just very emphatically said I wanted him to be and he looked very relieved and happy.
“I apologized for evading the topic before and Alan said it was OK because I was the best boyfriend he’d ever had with or without labels and that got us to the fun portion of the night.
“Anyway, a bit later I guess something twigged because he asked me if that was what dinner was about and said yes and he pinched my cheeks and called me adorable.
“Anyway, I asked him if we need to make an announcement or anything but we agreed that we wouldn’t say anything unless people brought it up or we need to introduce each other. Alan also said, he liked the term partner better than boyfriend and I agreed, it does sound more serious but I guess that’s what this is.”
Awwww, so cute!
"The Truth About Love..."
- Lucretius
"Selfie Love..."
"Selfie Love" - those beautiful, grainy, out-of-focus self-pics that capture the truth of true love...
Monday, May 28, 2018
"Selfie Love..."
"Selfie Love" - those beautiful, grainy, out-of-focus self-pics that capture the truth of true love...
"The Truth About Love..."
- Washington Irving
"Same Gender Loving People - No. 3061"
"Freedom To Love..."
Positive images of people like me... The truth of the matter is that we all need to see people like ourselves. So everyday, I'll post a photo, drawing or some other artwork that depicts Same Gender Loving People as what we are... Only Human.
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