Wednesday, April 26, 2017

"A True Love Story..."

Richard M. Kalasky & Carlos T. Hill
Marietta, Georgia

After 12 Years Of Struggle, Richard And Carlos Are Finally Dads

Edited and adapted from Gays With Kids

Richard and Carlos have been together 12 years since meeting online. We had a commitment ceremony in 2005, Civil Union in Colorado in 2012, and were legally married in 2015.

Carlos is a private chef and stay-at-home dad; Richard is a paramedic and Director of Sales for EMS, an anesthesia airway product.

The couple are new dads who adopted their now 7 month old son Devon Ambrose from birth. Richard is called “Daddy.” Carlos is called “Pops.”

They met online while both were living in Atlanta and talked for about a year before actually meeting in person due to work. At the time of their initial online contact and “meeting” Richard was working out of state for a federal law enforcement agency, and Carlos was working in insurance at the time, due to busy schedules, they did not get the chance for an in-person meeting.

Throughout the first year they kept in contact with extended late-night phone calls, video chats and text messaging before their initial in-person meeting. The couple said, "To us, we feel like this was a great benefit to our relationship." Meeting and communicating for so long online, but not face-to-face allowed  each of them to gain a level of comfort with the other, so that when they did have their first official time together in person they felt like old friends talking.

Carlos and Richard say that they tried adoption and surrogacy for 12 years and had many struggles. They say they always knew they wanted a family and finally had the opportunity to do an independent adoption last year. They supported their son’s birth mother during her pregnancy, helping her with life skills like finishing her GED, learning to grocery shop and cook, managing finances, and later with a resume to get the job she currently holds.

The couple share that they had a number false starts along their path to fatherhood and family, they shared that they were scammed by a birth mother who wasn’t pregnant but attempted to extort money from them. Because of that, they remained very guarded throughout the process of finding their independent adoption so as to protect not only themselves, but their son as well.

Despite the setbacks they encountered, the couple said they knew they just had to be patient and experience the lows along with the highs.

The couple say that becoming parents has strengthened their unconditional love for each other and their son and that it grows stronger every day. "Our son has also helped us build patience. Working together as a team, waking up for feedings, diaper changes, etc. it has also helped us to work on our communication with each other."

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